39-year-old Man’s rant to older Woman: “Good for you, stick with the old dudes”
Posted by BlueEyes1962 on 16 Jan 2008 at 02:30 pm | Tagged as: We Never Got Past Email
“Foxy” is an athletic 53-year-old divorced Fox Chapel mom who looks 35. Her online dating profile states she is seeking a 50 – 60 year old match.
“Doctor38″ (39-year-old man – Pittsburgh, PA – Seeks women 30-55) contacted her. She emailed him “Thank you for the interest, but I don’t want to date younger men.”
He sent the following reply:
Good for you, stick with the old dudes who have custody of their kids on the weekends and whose exwifes are still hanging around, making things uncomfortable for you, not to mention those teenage kids he’s got who don’t even like their own mother and are going to find it rather hard to deal with daddy’s new girlfriend who is taking up all of his free time.
And well, the holidays, well, they will tend to be awkward, mostly because his kids will hate you, and don’t forget those family vacations, with his kids, you know the ones, they are the little angels who will be staring daggers at you, while you sip you pina colada at the poolside restaurant at lunchtime, wondering how you ever thought it was a good idea to bring children on what he had told you was going to be a very romantic and fun beach vacation.
Oh and lets not forget the lack of sex drive he possesses, mostly because he’s been playing golf all day and then trying to satiate his own guilt as a father by telling the little monsters all about the next fun group hug you’ll all be going on
Yeah, I guess a doctor, with no kids, 5 weeks of vacation a year, who cooks and likes to openly express his feeling to the woman he adores, and is still interested in a passionate and physical relationship, sounds like a bad idea………..good for you, your mom did a good job……..
Foxy told me, “I am so mad at this a_ _ hole. I’m going to ream him a new one. But, what could I expect from some liberal, never been married doctor?”
What should Foxy do? How would you reply to him? Send in your suggestions (anonymously) by clicking on “comment” below.
can we really explain all the assholes in the world???im a 54 yr old man that dates…my kids are grown..and i seem to be doing ok after hours…if dr dimwit with no life ,other than his own egotistical self centered cant even get a date with an older woman and then blames everybody for it loser is having troubles….well GOOD…i like my chances even more with fools like him out there…i do take issue with the “liberal”label allocated to this idiot,however…
It’s the anonymity factor at work again. People feel they can say anything they please because they’re not face-to-face with the other person.
As to the reply: don’t waste your time. If you answer, he’ll like it.
I think it’s shortman syndrome…or maybe short everything syndrome.
I took a fun break from writing a proposal to think about your question! Here’s my theory: I think younger guys who pursue older women are looking for a woman who has resolved her own life issues, and is at a stage where she’s able and willing to be a superb listener for them. These relationships usually end up being more about the guy than the woman. If it becomes more about the woman, they usually split.
Re: the doc—-he has such huge anger issues and self-esteem issues, I’d run in the other direction!
Look out for someone on Match named r——e, he’s 36-38, forget. lol!
I have been pursued by younger men, prob for a variety of reasons…. diff things motivate diff men and women, but my exp w/younger men is generally too immature and not the greatest fit.
someone closest to your age (give or take 5 yrs either way), is usually most suited for obvious reasons.
Since my divorce tho, I have only dated younger men, never searched for it, just happened. I’ve had good and bad experiences for a variety of reasons.
At this point, after everything said or done, I’d find someone closest to my age, more in common and the chances of staying together over the long haul are much greater. ………. my 2 cents worth.
Doctor38 does not deal with rejection too well.
Any man/doctor who takes to time to reply like he did (rant) and the length that that he did, has WAY too much time on his hands, relies on Internet dating too much, doesn’t roll w/the punches, takes himself too seriously and this type of dating service way too seriously.
He’s probably been online surf-dating for a good while.
After 7 yrs worth (on and off) of ‘looking’ for a man through Internet dating services, (how bout a nice evening out that would include a second date) via the computer screen, I’d summarize it like this – it’s al ot of work, interviewing, reaching out, flying blind and living on the hope that you might be the fortunate one to meet someone that you hit it off with.
I know of 8 relationships in my friendship circle where people met their mates that way. I did not have that good fortune.
I am no longer pro-actively looking for a mate that way, but I am always amused to hear all the stories, which by the way, are mostly similar.
Anonymous said “I think it’s shortman syndrome”. But a woman friend of mine who has dated a wide variety of men swears that the tall ones are typically the assholes: they’re cockier, less honest, more selfish, and more controlling, while shorter men are kinder, more generous, and easier to get along with. She figured that the short ones have to work harder to get ahead in the world, the same way beautiful women can get away with being bitches more easily than ordinary-looking women.
I actually think that was a funny answer… And you know what, DOctor38 is quite right. Foxy should not be mad, but thankfull to the guy for saying the truth that nobody else have the guts to say. Maybe he does have the short man syndrome, or maybe he does have problems with rejection (who doesn’t?), but Foxy must have her own problems. After all if she was so secure of her choices, why getting so anoyed over an answer from a stranger?????
I’m loving this thread. I’ve had the flip side happen-much older men write me who think they can whisk me away on a boat to some far-off isle. One man, despite my courteous and honest answer of pointing out the age difference(almost 20 years) and a few other things which would have been glaring incompatibilities proceeded to list me 10 statistics on dating in the millenium and that I was ruling out way too many men and would end up alone. Nice, huh? I appreciate the fact these men are trying to give me advice (note the sarcasm).